bored stare

Christmas is ...blah

I hate holidays. I hate christmas. I hate being sick. I hate when I have to walk through snow or yucky slushy stuff on the ground and get my pants soaked and I hate hearing 8 fucking versions of "rockin' around the christmas tree" in the car. I hate mushy sentimental advertisments and I hate being told I should donate to this or that charity in the "spirit" of the holiday... what the fuck??? spirit of the holiday...bullshit...there is no christmas spirit...unless of course you concider "I want this...and I want that" to be a spirit...blah...call me any sort of anti holiday nickname you want to take from a book or movie...you know a grinch or a scrooge. I would rather be a lonely green monster living in a garbage filled mountain or a greedy old skitzo who thinks he sees ghosts and has nightmares because he's so fucking cheap he can't pay his employees enough to geed their gimp kids than some fucking cheery christmas elf pumping I love you's up santas ass...fuck the holidays...the end.
  • Current Music
    no music today...
cone

first update in a while...a personalized entry...hi jasmine...

Its been so long, not like it really matters. I know the only person who reads this is Jasmine so I might as well make it all like Hey Jasmine. Whats up? Not much with me. I'm talking to you on msn. I feel sad. I need a hug. I have grumpy bear with me. We have to do the rock lobster with pimp greg thingie cause that would just be the hottest!!!! I think the whole one monthness with Jesse is on my birthday...maybe the day after. Matty Is making a big deal about it. He seems to think its an important event. Meh...Birthday in 8 days... yay for sponge bob movie. SPPPPPPPPPPPPPPOOOOOOONNNNNNGEEEEEEEE BOB SQUARE PANTS........ I love the sponge...so hot....hot like mashed potatoes...hehe...So much space...not enough life to fill up the box...see you at school tommorow....*cough* wear the gold shirt *cough*
  • Current Music
    Blondie- Heart of Glass
cone

I don't get what they mean.

When people say words that make no sense. I hate it. I hate it when people fight.
I hate it when people tell me what I need to do to make myself a better person.
I hate it when people yell at me for bullshit that I don't want to deal with and force me to do something then expect me to clean up their mess. Fuck that. I would rather die.
I hate it when people try and make me what they want me to be. I hate you.
I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You know who you are. I hate you.
  • Current Music
    From Autumn to Ashes - Alive out of habit
cone

If I gave you pretty enough words could you paint a picture of us that works?

I went to visit my brother at Waterloo university yesterday. Fun trip. Bought more hair dye. Got my eyebrows done...the lady butchered them and I look horrible now! I met a really nice guy at a pet store and that was cool. Jasmine sent me a link to Gwen Stefani's solo single and its pretty awesome I must say. (No one will ever out gwen you) I went out today and stole corn from a field with my mom. It was semi fun but then when I got home my sister had been going through my stuff...thats not fun at all. I like water. Water is good. Ive been drinking a lot of water lately and my eye has been a bit twitchy. Twitchy isn't fun. Squirrels are creepy. Creepy creepy squirrels.
  • Current Music
    Atreyu- Demonology and heartache
cone

Paint smells a little funny and kind of gross

My dad has been painting my living room at it smells like blah. Its giving me a super headache because I am so incredibly sick. Despite my sickness I went driving today, my dad has to take me out because I've only got a G1/permit thing. Today was the most horrible day for me and carness...I hit a bunny. It made me so sad. I had to pull over the car and cry. People kept stopping to ask if I was ok because they had no idea what was going on, I guess they figured the car was broke down or something but when I replied "I hit a bunny" each time they just drove away laughing. Ohh well, I sooo owe bunnies now. I will make it up to every single other bunny in the entire universe for me just hitting the one and I promise to never do it again. *tear* Tommorow I might be in Beeton to hang out with my buddy Adam, depending on how nice my parents are feeling. I also happen to like a boy who lives in Beeton. He is two years older than me but is very nice and quite hot. I see him a lot but haven't talked to him much lately. I would like to try and maybe go out with him but I doubt it will happen. I'm a bit afraid of relationships because of all the stupid shit thats been happening between my mom and dad...and my having to tell my dad about my mom. My mom has been totally psycho latley. Going through all my stuff and watching everything I do...I see her all the time trying to see who I am talking to on msn, she reads my conversations and even calls people who have called me just to see who they are. I don't know how to deal with her, I have no privacy. She needs to get a live and stay out of mine.
  • Current Music
    Across Five Aprils- a year from now
cone

September has been...

This month has had its ups and downs so far. Banting is an amazing school. I have never really enjoyed going to school, but since starting there its been different. Everyone is so nice and I am very happy there. I have a 5th period spare so that helps me get my homework done so I have nights free to hang out with my friends and look for a job. I can't find a job anywhere. On my spare I also met a very nice boy that I happen to like a lot. Things at school have been so great that I actually hate the thought of going home. Home is where the hate is. My mom has been prying into every aspect of my private life and well...I don't have one anymore. She has been checking up on who calls me, who I call...reading msn conversations and going through my room on a regular basis. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs and I don't lie to my parents yet they treat me like I am the worst kid in the world. They should be happy with me, I could be so much worse than I am but I'm not.GRRRRRRRRRRR is all i have to say.
  • Current Music
    Alive out of habit- from autumn to ashes
cone

We played 80's

Today was a very awesome day. I got to sleep in a little then rushed to tidy up before Jasmine came over. We bleached her hair and did the toner and such. So awesome. After that we got all dressed up 80's style and wandered to Cassie's house, Kat came over too and it was so much fun. We had a lovely dinner at Cassie's and then sat around for a little while talking and it was great. I haven't been out of my house in forever so it was definatley extra fun for me. Tommorow....well actually today...just much later in the day I have to finish cleaning my room so I can get bleach for my hair and get it all ready to be dyed pink. I am so excited about the pinkness but I hate hate hate the cleaning. Oh well...anything for pink hair. I had a really good conversation with my brother today. We talked about a lot of stuff I had no idea I could talk to him about. I think I will miss him more than I expected when he leaves for university. I am happy he is here, he stands up for me to my mom and my sister. *sigh* she needs to stop thinking she runs my life! I've decided today to apply for a job at a few places, the local IGA and a health food store as well. I hope I get one job because I want to get my lip periced or maybe even as Jasmine suggested to be get a "monroe" peircing. I really want my lip done in the center.
  • Current Music
    Headfirst for halos - My chemical romance
cone

I love sweaters.

Sweaters are warm and fuzzy. They keep away the cold and they keep me nice and comfy. I bought a black hooded sweater and its my favourite. I like it lots. Today I met up at Dairy Queen with Jasmine. Had me some fries. Yay for fries. Tommorow I get to finish with making her blonde and it will be such fun. Matty (my "twin") and I have been whiteboarding on msn like mad. I drew satan living in a garden, playing with a doll. Man do I love sweaters. Yay for sweaters.
  • Current Music
    Undone (the sweater song)-Weezer
cone

today the water tasted like blood.

Maybe I just cut my mouth, but the water tasted like blood. It was disgusting. Like what I immagine drinking death would be like. I don't like death...well I do, but I don't want to drink it. Especially when it tastes like blood and for some god damn unknown reason is in my water. I'm watching the price is right. I used to think Bob Barker was my grandfather. I was wrong. He never wrote back to any of my letters. I always sent them to the ticket adress though. Maybe I should have tried a fan club or something. Bob's Beauties are whores. They suck. They should die. Maybe they're what is in my water. Thats exactly it. I'm drinking tv whores....
  • Current Music
    Chemical Chemical-Pretty girls make graves
cone

Your such a delicate boy in the hysterical realm....

I love things like kittens and horses and music and lawn gnomes. Lawn gnomes are the best. Some people call them Garden Gnomes....what the hell is up with that. I mean yes they sit in gardens for the most part...but thats not all they do. For those of you who choose to call them garden gnomes I say FUCK OFF... I am their Queen. I rule my gnomey people and we did not work so incredibly hard for the title of LAWN GNOMES only to be reduced to being called garden gnomes. God damn it. We can go on any part of any one's lawn...we need not be limited to the garden.
  • Current Music
    dreaming of you- the coral